Musings from the Library

I'm holding on to whatever it is that I'm holding on to, just to get this day over with.

I'm currently at the school library, waiting for my last class for the day. I am so still in the holiday mood. I can't believe I have to face a long test in 2 day's time. I haven't cracked a single book the whole break. The only thing school related that I did was copy my notes onto a nice notebook. I'm kind of OC sometimes. It's kind of hard to believe but I can be neat. Lol. Now my notes are nice and easy to read. Hopefully I do that because I have another long test on Saturday.

Which reminds me, I forgot to quit my job. Does anybody know how to write a 2 week's notice? I can't do it anymore. My subjects are more demanding this sem and I barely passed last sem. So I'm quitting. Kind of sad about the loss of income though but I'd be a bit more relaxed without a headstrong (that's putting it mildly) kid to worry about. I've got so much on my plate as it is, what with school and demented family issues, I don't need more reasons to binge on chocolate or ice cream. Mmm. I've been craving chocolate donuts and ice cream since last week. But I've gotta watch my weight and my wallet so too bad. I'll just settle for watching Will & Grace eat Ben n Jerry's from the container. They're my latest depression meds.

So there. I've successfully killed 30mins. I've got about 5mins to nap and then dash off to class. Thank heavens for MMS.

>.<

I tried squeezing my eyes tightly and concentrating, hoping that I somehow possess Hiro's powers.

It turned out that this tremendous feat only brought out the fart master in me.

Kidding, guys.

It's only the second day of the year and I'm already feeling depressed. Why? Well, one thing is that I didn't complete my new year's eve blogathon. Another thing is that I haven't studied a thing since vacation started, and now I only have 5 days to complete all of the assignments: stuff for events management, prepare for 2 long tests for next week, read really really long readings, and rewrite my notes.

Oh, and yeah, my cousin was shot by some random asshole while he was chatting with his sister outside their house the other day and right now he's at the brink of death.

What kind of sick, twisted world do we live in???

Everything was fine a couple of days ago. I was actually having a happy Christmas. Well, except for two instances when my mom annoyed the hell outta me but I can just be a bitch sometimes so we just forget about it the next day.

We were fine. We were happy. I greeted some people a happy new year too. And then that terrible news came and I just can't help but stop. Just stop. I want everything to stop for a second and just let me digest this situation. How can a wonderful holiday turn into a freakish nightmare, just like that?

I'm not really close with my cousin who got shot. I barely even see him. I only saw him again (after what, eight, nine years?) Christmas morning. He was here and he was smiling and it was great seeing all of them. And then just like that...

Now I'm facing my impending return to the hellhole I call school. I don't know why. I loved school in my sophomore year. I mean, not totally loved it (there were definitely a lot of sucky moments), but this school year is just HORRIBLE. I swear. I feel like I'm not getting anywhere in any subject. Well, I guess it's just theology that I hate. It's not the subject, really. It's more of the teacher.

I mean, he is a pretty cool teacher by normal standards, but seriously, his teaching style sucks. I can't understand what he's trying to say. Even the people sitting right in front of him can't understand what he's saying. I'm actually missing our previous theo prof (who we thought was sent up from the deep south). At least we knew what to answer to pass his course. But this... My prof now makes me dread every MWF. I sit there every session staring at him and concentrating really hard, with everything I've got, just to get the gist of what he's saying. But he keeps on jumping from one point to the other without really explaining each very well. So what I get is just this whole mess of stuff in my notebook that I can't make sense of.

Bah, I don't wanna think about it anymore. Basta, I'm going to look for 150-pesos shoes and clean up my notes and read everything I'm supposed to read. I can't give up now; life will continue to suck anyway.