What I Want to Know

I want to know him.

I wanna know his quirks. I wanna know what's under that tough exterior. I wanna know that side he doesn't show just anybody. I wanna know what he goes through everyday - the mundane and the extraordinary. I don't care if he complains about the most boring thing like the difference between software upgrades or announce a success like closing a big account - I'd listen and sympathize with it all. I just want to know how his day went.

I also want to know about his hobbies and habits - what he does on weeknights and weekends, random things he does when he has minutes to spare and also, if he has them, little de-stressing rituals done in-between hectic schedules.

I want to know what makes him happy, what makes him sad, what brings out the best and worst in him. I wanna see him at his worst because in my eyes, he's always at his best. I want the whole picture.

I wanna know what comforts him and what agitates him. I also want to know what makes him smile - and at the same time, wish that I were one of those things. I wanna know what makes him feel all tingly inside so I could do them because he makes me feel all tingly inside by just being there, even if he's in a whole other room.

I wanna know everything about his past - the happy memories, the heartaches, the embarrassments, the triumphs - everything. I wanna know how he became him. With that, I also want to know his imperfections, fears, and insecurities so that we could overcome them together.

I wanna know his opinion about things: books, music, movies, current events, people, etc. We could discuss/argue about them. I also want to know about his feelings, what he feels about certain things, at certain times, and how he deals with those feelings.

Of course, I'd like to know his favorites and pray that one day I'd be one of those.

What does he like? What doesn't he like? What's he on-the-fence for? What are his plans? What motivates and inspires him? Even a general idea would do.

I wanna know about his family and friends. I wanna know about his childhood dreams and which ones came true. I wanna hear funny stories about silly escapades and I'd tell him mine 'cause I've got lots of those. What did he want to be when he grew up? Who was his best friend and are they still talking? I wanna know about his childhood.

There are so many things that I'm eager to know about him. But simply put, I just want to know him. I want him to share himself with me because I'm eager to share myself with him.

Sunday Afternoon

I'm so happy that I do not need to see the office today. Not that I hate it, but I've been there every single day for the past two weeks. True, we went to Baguio for a few days but it still felt like being in that office.

So today, I'm cherishing every moment that I'm away from there. Even if I still can't escape text messages regarding work, at least I can think about solutions in a different environment. Feels refreshing. :)

On the other hand, I only have maybe a couple of weeks to spend in that blue room. We're moving to another location early September, according to my boss. I'd really like to be excited about it. I mean, that new place would give our agency a little bit more credibility. We'd actually feel like a real agency. But leaving the old place means leaving six months of memories behind. It's leaving half a year of friendship. As much as I hate to admit it, I will surely miss some people. Some more than others.

But oh well, I guess this means I'm moving forward in my career. The past week and a half have been surreal. I am overworked and underpaid and hopefully it's worth the sacrifice.

I remember the time when I was seriously considering quitting this job. I really wanted to be self-employed. I still do. But the past week has ignited in me some sort of purpose. I was made to do things out of my job description. It was difficult but I knew that it was for the greater good of the company. That this would be our big break - the opportunity to prove to everybody that we're capable of more than they'll ever know.

Recently, I've been re-evaluating plans I've already made before I got this job. I was gonna experience life abroad. I was gonna expand my horizons. I still really wanna do that, but it's not that easy anymore. I've become attached. It sucks, but I have. Hell, when I first came in, I was only gonna give it 3 months and then I'm gone. But maybe God gave me crazy (in a good way) officemates for a purpose. There were times of self doubt and insecurities but now I'm just chillin'. I can't imagine working with anyone else but them.

And then there's... Well, yeah. That's another matter.

So right now, as I sit here in my brother's business thinking of ways on how to improve it, I try to also think about the future. Where will I be 5 years from now? Will I have done things that I've always wanted to do like handle my own business and study abroad? (my dad was suggesting that I pick apples in Austalia for a living. Sounds nice and peaceful.$ Or would I have succumed to the comfort of a steady employment? I really am not sure right now. I hate breaking my plans but if better things could be had, then why not?

Ewan. Ewan. Ewan.

Minsan hindi ko nalang alam anong gagawin. Magulo ang mundo. Magulo ang mga pakiramdam. Nasusuka, najejebs... Iba't ibang symptoms sa sakit na wala namang gamot. At hindi naman talaga sakit na tipong lagnat... Pero yun tipong masakit talaga - sa kalioban at sa pisikal. Mas gugustuhin ko nalang lagnatin kesa sa sakit na ganito. Pero wala naman akong ibang masisisi kundi ang sarili ko kasi isa akong dakilang tanga. Hindi na ako natuto eh.

Tama na, please.

The Sophomore Curse?

I don't think this particular curse applies to the second installment of Iron Man. The special effects alone were enough go blow one's mind. Add to that Robert Downey Jr.'s quintessential portrayal of Tony Stark and all his cool stuff, Iron Man 2 is indeed a must-watch.

However, there's something about this movie that didn't give me the complete satisfaction that the first one did. At 2 hours, it isn't that long (usually superhero movies run for 2 1/2 hrs). I don't know if that's the reason why the whole thing felt rushed. It made the same mistake that Spiderman 3 did: cram too many things into a single movie.

1. The blood poisoning
2. Tony and Pepper's relationship
3. Tony and his dad's relationship
4. Recruitment to SHIELD
5. The villain, Ivan Vanko
6. Tony's responsibilities to the future

Kudos to the writers who were able to sew all these things together into an intelligible and highly-entertaining screenplay. But there were things that were left unexplained because the action didn't leave much room to do so.

1. What's with Vanko's always saying "You lose" when clearly, he's the one who lost?
2. What's the extent of Tony and Pepper's relationship? Was that their first kiss or has the romance been going on for a long time?
3. So... What's that new element called?
4. What the heck does this movie really wanna tell us?

The biggest question in my head is that last one. The first movie had a clear aim: to show us how and why Iron Man came to be. Part 2 is confusing: is this really about Tony's journey to be an Avenger or his withstanding the consequences of Stark Industries' operations or his father's revelation of his (Tony's) role in the future?

I'm thinking that maybe a second viewing is needed to get me a clearer grasp of the plot. Come on, DVD!

My verdict:
Due to Stark's sheer awesomeness, even if there were a few glitches in the movie, I give it four stars out of five. On to the thrid!!!

Testing out the App

I've just rediscovered the awesomeness of my iTouch. Since last week was an all-out stare-at-the-wall week in the office, I was introduced by my officemate to Twitter. Also, since the Internet connection there is more or less imaginary (for desktops, at least), I brought my handy iTouch and voilà! Instant entertainment. Social networking sites and games blockage became history.

And now I've found an app for blogging! Woohoo! My plans of maintaining multiple blogs have been revived.

Alright, so I'm testing out the app now. I hope it works fine and actually posts this entry.

Sneak Blogging

1 hour nalang and I can go home and watch my shows. I miss being a bum. I was able to get the latest SPN episode and I haven't had the time to see it yet. Inuna ko kasi kagabi ang Big Bang Theory. I really needed a laugh. And now that CoCo's gone from The Tonight Show, I don't have my nightly late night fixes. Well, maaga na rin akong natutulog ngayon. But even though I sleep early, I still feel sleepy in the morning. As if I'm not done with school yet, I still try to prolong my sleep as much as I can. Lol. That's why I designed the 5 More Minutes shirt, right. (Free endorsement ng SHIRT STREET!!!)

Hopefully later I'd be greeted by last week's Bones, 30 Rock, and HIMYM. Although may AI later and baka si Barney the awesome Stinson ang guest! And may WWE Raw. Lots to watch. Ugh. Pwede bang mag-absent para lang makapanood ng stuff. And I need to read all the unread and unfinished books in my room. Seriously. Ginagawa nalang silang apartment ng mga alikabok doon.

Oops, boss called me into the office. Papagawin nanaman akong concept ng TVC. Yey! Haha. Now I have to think about this hanggang makauwi ako. Gana utak, gana.