I Missed the Full Moon

Last night, the moon was bright and full in the evening sky...so as my brother said. I missed it. I didn't get to go out. I just slept through the whole day and tweaked my blog. (See the flickr flash over there?)

I love full moons. They're so romantic and halloween-y. I love just staring at it.

It is poetic on its own. It's so melancholic against the darkness of the night sky. It's as if it's so alone...

The stars are there to shine with it at night, but they're so far away, and they're not exactly the same. Some people may think it useless to have a moon. One, it doesn't have its own light (it just borrows from the sun, which is a star). Two, it doesn't provide heat or moon-energy or whatever.

Still, it is most humble. Though it needs to admit subordination and borrow from the sun, it does, just to give us light when everything is dark, when the sun can't and all the other stars are too far away to give.

Once a month-yes, only once-it gets to dominate the sky in all its glory. And those days, I love. It's weird, actually. On those days, I tend to wonder. About things...About life...what's going on, what's going to happen, what I want and if I'm ever gonna get to them. My imagination runs amuck. I start to visualize what might be, what I wish might be.

And then all things just...falls away. I get really sad...I think of him and get really sad... I think of why my life's going this way...why I'm loveless...

Most of the time, it's just general sadness that settles in. I can't explain it. It just does.

On rare occasions, I get hopeful. Like when Halloween or Christmas approaches. The full moon brings me endless possibilities. Yes, the imagination is there, but this time, on an optimistic note. I get the feeling that yes, it might be possible, it could really happen, I can make it to. I think this is the more dangerous one because I soar high with all idealism...and I'd crash hard. No, a white Christmas isn't possible over here afterall. I won't be spending it with my special someone, because I'm not special to that someone, or any other someones. I will grow up to be another Bridget Jones without the Mark Darcy part, singing "All by Myself" over and over during holidays, watch sappy movies, climb on the weighing scale while munching on a donut, and hate myself for being fat, then rant about it in my private diary, and probably on this blog, if it's still working.

However, all this negativity sums up to a hopeful thought. Wherever I am, whatever might be, there will always be the lone moon, revolving around the earth, bringing light, maybe love, and it will be that same moon that'll hover over us. It'll be that same moon we'll look at and ponder on.

W.O.M.B.A.T.

Argh!!! I so hate myself!

I took teh W.O.M.B.A.T. test at J.K.Rowling.com (if you're a Potterhead, you'd know what I'm talking about). The results tool so long to be released. I think I took it five months ago or something. Now, I can't access my results because I lost my damn ID code! Argh! Where did I write it down? Did I just scribble it in a scrap of paper or a notebook or maybe saved it as a word document? I so wanna see my results! I'm racking my brain for the place I put that ID code...

WHERE IS IT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

I am Yoda

how jedi are you? :: by lawrie malen

I got Yoda!!! He's my favorite Jedi. It takes a lot of brainpower to invert every sentence you utter.

Maybe I gotta start doing that, just to appear smart...or totally weird.

Anyway, I've just finished updating the layout, as you can see (or not). This blogger beta thing is just so tiring. On one hand, the widgets are cool and easy to drag around. On the other hand, the previous pre-beta template was easier to tweak. And I love tweaking my template. I don't know. Maybe when I get more time, I'd probably shift back to the old one and tweak away.

A Welcome Distraction

At last, the last project of the week was just completed awhile ago. (Okay, not really completed...there are still some tweaking to be done. And some additions...okay, never mind. I don't wanna think about it right now) Three big projects due and all we got were five measly days to do them (because we procrastinated! whahaha!).

The past few days were just HELL ON EARTH. It's a miracle I lived to see Friday. I feel like just collapsing right now.

But amidst all the frenzy of this earthly Hades, there is still one thing that made me look forward to school.

What?

Christ Tiu!

Who?



Chris Tiu. Jersey #17 of the Ateneo Blue Eagles.

Okay. I admit, I've never been that interested in the UAAP. True, I've heard his name several times whilst I was still in high school, but I never payed much attention. I like basketball, but after I was ten, I stopped watching games. My TV preference kinda shifted to wrestling, heeheehee.

Anyway, UAAP season 69 was just over, and we lost. We only got second place, but hey. Life's not perfect! They did their best and I'm proud of them. I failed to watch the first two games of the championship (the first one, I didn't know about. the secondone, we didn't have electricity.) I wasn't really planning to watch the thrid one, but the promise of "suspension of classes" if we win and some USTe friends of mine texting and taunting me (because I'm the only Atenean they know) fuelled me to tune in. We still didn't have electricity then, so I watched the first quarter in the caf on the TV with really really bad reception (all I could see was static; I can't even tell if the ball went in when someone shoots). The next two quarters I missed because I was commanded by dear ol' mummy to come home 'cause we're gonna transfer to some apartell. She took forever to pack. Luckily, I managed to catch the fourth and the OT.

I love sports and am always excited when I'm really into what I'm watching. Just sitting in front of that small ass TV transported me back to high school. The relentless cheering when my team got the ball, the suspended heartbeat, holding my breath, heart soaring when we score and dropping when we don't.. It was just so much fun. Of course, I was devastated when we lost. I admit, I'm not a Blue Eagle fanatic like others, but I'd want my school to win. Still, it's okay. If it's not for us, it's not.

So, after that long-rambling intro...on to Chris Tiu. I knew of him, as I said, since high school. I've seen him in a couple of magazines so I knew what he looked like. So one day, when my blockmates and I had to go to the computer lab, I saw him sitting on the bench at the side, reading a newspaper. I wasn't too sure that that was him, until I saw him again a few weeks later in that same spot. (This was after the last game) I wanted to say hi, show some support or something, but I was afraid I'd scare him away or maybe upset him even more.

It's weird when you notice someone, it's like, you suddenly see that someone everywhere. I started to see him walking around campus often. We're even in the same building at the same time (although his classroom is at the thrid floor...). I've been telling my friends about those "encounters" (I make him sound like a paranormal entity) and they want to see him, too. So today, lucky lucky day for my dear friend Joycee. We were walking to our Fil class. It was going to be held in a different building because our original classroom somehow lost its LCD projector. On our way, I was already thinking that I won't get to see Chris today 'cause of the new venue.

I was pleasantly surprised. I froze on my tracks and, as discreetly as possible (although I was obvious, if they had good eyes) that Chris was standing right in front of us, wearing a red shirt and twirling a roll of white cartolina. We "casually" went past him and then giggled to death when we thought he was out of earshot.

He is just so cute.

He's a good ball player, too.

And apparently a very industrious and brainy student.

And a nice guy.

What more could you ask for?

Sigh...

As usual, all the good ones are taken, and that includes him. :(

As if I have a chance, right? Oh well.

On Potter... (I get it. Stop yawning.)

I was going through blogs awhile ago (trying to score points...) and was getting really drowsy when I stumbled over one with a post titled Damn That Potter . Of course, addicted as I am, it immediately caught my attention.

What did Harry do again?

I thought it was another one of those hatemongers' rambles against Harry. I was pleasantly surprise, and relieved, that the author was actually frustrated with being branded as "childish" or someone with "no intellect" because of reading and liking the Harry Potter books.

True, true, the books were initially aimed at children, but that doesn't mean adults are restricted from reading, nor liking, them. They are good books: very well written and contain multiple levels. As I explained on an earlier post (just dig around somewhere, I know I've mentioned this) some people can read it on one level - that is, the very shallow one. Just Harry and the magical world. On other levels, you can read the emotional development of the characters. You can actually delve into their psyche, especially Harry's, who is a very round and well-developed character. If you dig deeper, you can also read it in the light of politics (the Ministry of Magic is very similar to real-life governments).

Just because it is under the children's section doesn't mean the book is stupid. At least it's not just about some teenagers stressing about what color of dress they'd wear for the prom or if their crush would ask them out. I do read those kind of books when my brain is too numb to think. But Harry Potter books aren't just for passive reading. It gets you involved. It makes you feel. Every word transports you to that magical world, and it places you smack in the middle of the goings-on of Harry's life. There are aspects in the HP books that are too complicated for children to fathom. For example, Harry's battle with himself, his emotions, what Dumbledore is trying to say to him, to accept his fate and his impending doom. These things can be read in a simplistic manner, like the wicked with in Snow White, that kind of evil. But as adults, if you read this kind of struggle as a simple fairytale-wicked-witch-versus-princess kind of struggle, then the books aren't the problem. YOU ARE. You have too simple a mind to actually get a deeper reading of it.

A lot of adults, if put in Harry's place, wouldn't even be able to handle it. A lot of suicides would probably take place if ever. So for those snobs, to brand HP as "childish" and "stupid" is just the same as saying that you yourselves are childish and stupid. Give it a try, why don't you. If you're that much of a genius like you think you are (which, by the way, would probably mean that you have Narcissism as your personality disorder), you've got nothing to lose. Stop dissing and start reading.

Hatemongers....Hatemongers......Hatemongers MUST DIE!!! Hatemongers....Hatemongers....Hatemongers MUST DIE!!!

Luuuuurrrrrvvvveeee......

I'm uber tired, it's almost 4 AM.

So why aren't I asleep yet?

Weeeellll........

I just realized that I could email the pics on my mobile phone to myself. Ha!

I don't have the USBs and stuff to hook the phones up to the PC to upload them pics, and my other phone's bluetooth just isn't working.

Yes, it's a lot of money (5php each! Geez!) but...I have no other choice. I'm running out of phone memory.

So...here's a li'l sumthin' sumthin' that I did.

I know, it sucks.

Cheesy-sucky piece of chicken sh*t.

But hey, bagay kami! Woohooo! I love you Chase!

I'm going to sleep now.

She's Da Man!!!

Last night, my roaring laugh was heard all over the house. I was watching She's The Man, a movie starring Amanda Bynes. Alright, some will say it's another cheesy teen movie, but what the heck. I like feel-good movies, and this is one of them. Corny and predictable as they may be, at least they help ease a bit of my tension, especially now that it's HELL MONTH. 3 more weeks of hell to go...

Anyway, a friend of mine texted me about her new "crush". I was like, "Okay, who's the new guy?" I thought it was one of our friends, but then it turns out to be Amanda Byne's leading man in this movie. I didn't see the movie when it was being shown (I really wanted to but I had no time, and especially NO MONEY) so I downloaded it right away.

Just as I expected, Amanda was hilarious! She was pretending to be a boy (to be her twin brother) and she looked really cute with her million different facial expressions! I love her, She's the most genuine "teen" star that I've seen. The nicest. She's great at what she does, but she doesn't get her head bloated.

Of course, another motive for my watching the flick was that I got curious about this new crush of my friend. She said that he was ultra hot. I kinda have faith in her taste in guys, but I also kinda like cute guys, but hey, hot is hot. Initially, I searched for the guy's name and saw his pics. Uhm...wasn't too impressed. So I proceeded to see the movie.

Man, he was steaming!

He played a jock, a soccer (football, if you may) player so there were lots of locker scenes...get my drift? Haha! He was a pretty okay actor for me. He wasn't great or anything, but as a newcomer, he didn't suck, so that's great.

Okay, so now I introduce to you, Channing Tatum.




This is him in the movie.



This is him...well, being HOT. Hehehe! He is, actually, a model. For Nautica, and others.

Okay, so this abundance of cute/hot guys posted here got me thinking, I'm going to do a year-end poll for the top 5 hottest guys that I've introduced here. The cut-off will be the end of December (duh) so take note of whoever will be appearing here again. :) Go on and check out the archives now!!!

My Personality Disorders

Personality Disorder Test Results Paranoid |||| 18% Schizoid |||||||||||||| 54% Schizotypal |||||||||||| 46% Antisocial |||| 18% Borderline |||||||||||||| 58% Histrionic |||| 18% Narcissistic |||||| 30% Avoidant || 10% Dependent |||||||||||||| 54% Obsessive-Compulsive |||||||||| 38%

Take Free Personality Disorder Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

I'm doing our psych project and it's already 4am and my brain feels like it's been hit with a sledge hammer ten times.

HP+Theo

Theo class ended only ten minutes ago. Yes, I got a hold of a computer right away.

I wasn't really paying attention to his explanations. I was too busy brooding over the quiz we just had. It was open notes, and I only got 4 out of 5. The answer to the last question was right at my face but I still didn't get it! How pathetic am I?! I'm actually flunking that subject, and I'm hating myself for it. Kahit D man lang... Shemay talaga!!! ARGH!!!

Anyway, ayoko nang problemahin yan. Baka mapatay ko lang sarili ko. I computed, and 69.8 ang labas. Leche.

The only thing that caught my attention of his long rambling was this sentence: "If you were asked to pick a power in the world, the best one to pick is the power of love."

The power of love...

Yes, it's the title of a song, but I'm not gonna talk about that. (I don't really like the song very much)

If you read Harry Potter, or even bothered to go see the movies, this line would be very familiar. In the fifth book, they were talking about a room in the Department of Mysteries which had a locked door that couldn't be picked. It was said that within that room lies the greatest "weapon" of all. Tying it up with the prophecy:

"The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches ... born to
those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month dies ... and the
Dark Lord will mark him as his equal, but he will have power the Dark Lord knows
not ... and either must die at the hand of the other for neither can live while
the other survives ... the one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord will be
born as the seventh month dies ..."

The "power the Dark Lord knows not" refers to - what else - LOVE. As Dumbledore have so many times said to Harry, this is what protected him from Voldy that day his parents got murdered. It's what kept him safe all these years, kept him from being possessed too long, and this will eventually be the greatest power he will have over Voldemort.

What's the point of me saying this? Well, for all those losers out there who say that Harry Potter is satanic and evil... IN YOUR FACE. HP books revolve around LOVE. We are saved because of Jesus' LOVE, that's why He died for us. Now how can you say that HP is evil???

My advice: Read the books and take Theo 121.

LSS--> Last Show Syndrome

Ah...the cool airconditioned atmosphere of the library is very soothing after being exposed to scorching heat all day. I feel so sticky, and with my current semi-depressed state plus the horrible quiz results (although they're better than the previous ones), this is indeed a bad day. And I have to stay until 6pm for some NSTP spiritual thingy.

Now, to take my mind off how sucky this day is, I'm going to talk about my current addictions.

I've downloaded several TV series (hooorah!) and they laid stuck in my hard drive for some days. One boring I-forgot what-day-it-was day, I decided to start watching Supernatural. I absolutely am fascinated by this show when I first saw its trailer in AXN, but I wasn't able to keep track of it regularly because I didn't know the showing schedule. So I downloaded it. So then, I watched it.

It was GRRRRRREAAATTT!!!!!!!!!

Well, except for a couple of sucky episodes, it was great. I was hooked! I watched it until the wee hours of the morning. It's about these two brothers whose mom got killed by some paranormal monster. She died, stuck on the ceiling, her belly bloody, and she burst into flames. Now, after that incident, Sam and Dean Winchester's dad got caught up in hunting for the monster that killed his wife. The boys grew up to be hunters. Dean, the older brother, stayed with his dad, while Sam, faught with his dad often and eventually went his own way to college. So one day, their dad went on a hunting trip and didn't come back for days. Dean went to get Sam, but he refused to come with. After his girlfriend got barbecued the same way as his mother, he agreed to go.

So there, that's where everythign began. They met murderous shadows, killer ghosts, Tibetan thought forms and crazy people. It was great, funny at times. They're the cutest brothers I've ever seen (haha!), some of the scenes gay-ish at times. But still, they're hot. Dean is indeed handsome, but I find Sam's college boy look and attitude more endearing. Which brings me to the introdction of my first obssesion:

JARED PADALECKI a.k.a. Sam Winchester



He was also in Gilmore Girls and House of Wax, the one with Paris Hilton (I didn't know who he was then, but I thought he was cute. Pity he died a minute into the film)

I consumed the whole first season of Supernatural in less than a week (I think maybe three days?). A couple of days after, I had to watch something. TV got boring. So I chose to see House M.D. I first saw this show way back, I think a year ago, I don't remember exactly. I didn't like it then. I've read a lot of good reviews though, and heard of the show winning some awards. I guess I didn't really watch. But then a few weeks ago, I saw an episode where they were treating a 9 year old girl with terminal cancer. This really cute doctor (whom I didn't see before) was preping her fo MRI, and then the kid said that she haven't been kissed by a boy before, and was afraid that she'd never be able to with her condition. Dr. Chase (the cute doc) refused when she asked him to kiss her. He was initially unmoved by her condition, but right then and there, I guess he kind of softened up. He gave her a kiss. (I wish I was her!!!!!!!!!!!! Minus the cancer and other illnesses!) Ok, so that's not the whole reason why I watch the show. Dr. House (hence the title) is a terrific doctor. Head of the diagnostic department, he is an insufferable, pompous ass with sarcasm as his first language. But I can't deny that he is brilliant, absolutely brilliant! He's so intelligent and stubborn. His colleagues are outraged by his crazy calls but in the end, he always turns out right. I have the last episode of season 2 to watch later and I'm really really sad because I have to wait again for succeeding episodes. House actually got me thinking about going to med school! But I have to think about that. I have 2 years. Haha!

And so, the most adorable doctor I've seen, who I'd willingly get sick for in order to just get examined by is...

JESSE SPENCER a.k.a. Dr. Robert Chase


His name is so familiar. I know I've seen it somewhere before, I just don't know where. He's in Neighbors, the Aussie show (he is Aussie; I thought he was Brit). And then I read that he's the guy in Uptown Girl, the boyfriend of Brittany Murphy's character there. Ok. So that's where I saw him. He was so cute there, the character I didn't like much, but he was so cute there. I like him better as a doctor. :)

So now, I've killed an hour. Time for the spiritual thingy!