One word:
I just woke up. It's 10am, and I'm still kinda drowsy... My normal waking time is around 12 noon. Heeheehee.
So, I'm supposed to be making "pulboron" right now. Wala lang, just wanna make something. After my "Mrs. Fields" cookies turned out to not taste like Mrs. Field's at all, well, I need to make something. I'm also thinking about making Yema Balls and Macaroons and Pastillas de Leche and Leche Flan. Sweets galore!!! Merry Christmas to one and all!
I dreamt of Mark Wahlberg. He's hot. And it was weird. The dream, I mean. He was sitting in our dining room where there's a TV, and he was watching Four Brothers, his latest movie!!! Which was weird, because it's already showing, and then he got up and said that he's gotta go because he needed to meet someone and make some editing and cuts and stuff. I asked him if me and my friends could have a pic with him, but he said he's really got to go, but will be back in an hour so we can take the pic then. He's really hot. And for the duration of the dream, which took place in our dining room and living room and part of the kitchen, no one really talked to him. Because he's such a big star.
Yihee!
And that guy in Scrubs, John Dorian, I think that's his character's name, he was also in my dream. I beat him up to a pulp. I don't know why. I think because he's such an ass in the dream. But he's cute.
So anyway, that's all there is this time. Still no story!
Snoopy is DEAD!!!
Kenken, Jing, Ann and Joyce @ Munch Gulp! 
Ann on da phone, Joyce & G Javs on walang kamatayang posing! Picture Picture!
Me n Kenken!!!
Drew and G. Javs! (Parang nakainom eh noh.)
Mato and Drew. Take note of Lilo&Stitch!
Lawrence singing!
G. Javs and the Hidden Mic-key! 
Yep, there's always the r a i n b o w after the rain.
From being totally down on the dirt from the last post, I'm actually quite happy today! I hope it goes on throughout the day though.
But anyway, why am I happy? First of all...HP GoF is 6 days away!!! And I've got reservations! Not premiers though, but heck, it's still on the 16th so it'll still be the opening day. If only I could cut classes.
What really made me happy was... Yesterday, during enrollment, I ran into G. Javs in the line to the cashier. He was going to DLSU after, to be with the guys during U-break. I thought I had doctor's appointment, so I said I'll just drop by with him for a quick chat. And so after rushing to the ID validation, we traversed the long long distance from Katips to Taft. Around 1:17pm, G and I got off the car and precariously crossed the busy street of Taft to Munch Gulp, where my long-time-no-see friends were hanging out.
Ah, it was like heaven seeing them for the first time in months. Yep, that's right. MONTHS. Before, we're already withered with grief when we don't see each other for a few days or weeks. Now, yeah, months. I hope it doesn't turn to years! So there, shrill sounds of excitement escaped from us when we got together. We hugged, chatted and of course, took pics! There were a lot of things to catch up on, but we didn't get to because others had to leave early for class and stuff. So we went forth to what's-it's-name, a "hang out place" for them during extended break times. We got beer! Yeah! At 2pm! G and I even forgot that we haven't eaten anything yet and we had beer. Well, a couple of sips only. No harm done!
The most fun part was when we did karaoke!!! Singing along to beautiful songs with bad musical arrangements is so much fun. First of all, nobody cares if you suck because it's too noisy to point out which one was doing the song justice and which one was like fingernails on a chalkboard. I had loads of fun! In my school, when I had 2-hour breaks, I slept in the library. There's nothing to do on campus except rot infront of a computer. Off campus, well, that's another world. It's like, miles away. We need to ride a trike to get to McDo or Jabbee. If you walk, it's like having your week's workout needs done in a day.
So I say, it's more fun in Taft. The people who matter are there. Yeah I know that it's also good to make new friends. I mean, I do have new friends now, and it's nice. But for me, knowing a lot of people have its perks, like for connection and popularity purposes. But who needs a lot of people that will only be mere faces afterwards, when you have the handful of people that can be your everything for a whole lifetime?
It's almost dawn, and I'm still awake. Yeah, I've got some sort of sleeping problem.
I used to really like staying up 'til the wee hours of the day, just like now. There's nothing to watch on tv, but nothing stops me from watching anyway. I like it because in these hours, there's total silence. There are no cars driving by the street below. There are no people passing by noisily. Everybody in the house is asleep. I feel like I've got the world to myself. It feels great. There's no one to disturb me. It's just me and the tv, or me and my journal. I love writing on my journal during this time of day. It's like, I can meditate better on my life's happenings. It's so peaceful, so tranquil. And there's like a different side of me that comes out, one that is more meditative, one that is more reflective.
Five months ago, everything changed. I just want to spend all my time sleeping now. People say that I already have a sleep disorder. Trust me, I don't. I just like to sleep a lot. Sleep helps me escape from this world. If it brings me to fairy tale land or nightmare kingdom, I don't care, as long as it's somewhere else.
It was fun having a month of bumming. And now that month is almost over, I wonder where it has gone. I can't believe that a month has already passed by, yet nothing has happened, nothing has changed. A month is a long time, yet everything's the same. I'm still fat, I still am here, and I'm still missing high school. And I have no story whatsoever yet. So much for Nanowrimo.
Is time getting faster? Are the days getting shorter as the years go by? Is it just me, or do you feel it too? I mean, I had a month's break, and it felt like I just closed by eyes for a minute, and I wake up and a month's gone by already. I had a to do list for this break, and I don't think I accomplished even a single task. Why is a month so quick? Days were longer when I was younger. Was it because I was not yet aware of the time? I had so much time back then. Now I just want to stop time, just pause everything, and look around. See where my life is going. What everything means. What all these are for.
There's always the future that I worry about.
It's so hard to keep up with things, especially with people. I came from a very secluded school, and now I'm thrown into this huge hole where everyone is so...different. I've come across vocal people back in SJ, but now, vocal takes on a whole new meaning. I loved working with people back then. I admit, I'm a very lazy person, but I liked staying after school. It's like extra time for me to chat with friends, hang out, do some pranks, have a laugh, and actually accomplish something. I admit I want to get back home right after school back then, but today, I don't even want to leave the house. I look forward to going home. And when I'm home, I only think about the time that I'll be home the next day.
Don't worry, college is different for everybody. I see some of my batchmates are actually having the time of their lives, like they finally found home. Well, it's just them. I'm a quiet person. I do get chatty, but I'm a thoroughly quiet person. I value very much my alone time. I'm not a party person, and I'm terrified of public speaking. I'm not very opinionated, and I tend to just blend with the background. I don't really like being in the limelight. I just want to get through without being noticed. But someday, I also want to be famous. I mean, celebrities have it easy for them. Yeah, I know they say it's hard, blah, because they don't have privacy and blah, but they have it easy for them. First of all, they've got truckloads of cash. If they grow fat, they can just go have liposuction. If they get tired of the world, they could just hop on a plane to Tahiti or somewhere to relax. They don't have to save months and months of allowance just to have enough money to buy Christmas gifts. They don't have to worry about what's going to happen in their lives. I mean, if they get tired of acting, they can just sing (even if they can't) and vice versa. Or maybe have their own perfumes or clothing lines or record companies. They can just hang out. No need to study. Yeah, stars do study too, but they don't exactly need to finish anything. Take the Olsen twins for example. They have their own firm, or company, or whatever. And they had that when? When they were 15 or 16? I'm 18 and I do not have a penny to my name.
When I was younger, I always wondered what it was like being 18. It must be so cool, I thought. I can drive, I can drink. It's the legal age! I can even get married if I wanted to. I've always thought of 18 as the ultimate age. It's like, the year when my life changes, where something big will happen to me, like in the movies or something. In movies like Chasing Liberty, American Pie, etc, the characters turned 18 and they started doing all these stuff, like escaping to a foreign country or go on a vacation somewhere cool with no parent supervision. They party. And eventually end up with the cute guy. And have lots of fun. I've been 18 for almost 4 months and yet nothing remotely close to that has happened to me.
There's gotta be something out there.
I can't wait to get out of here. I wanna go someplace else. And yet, I wanna stay home forever. Isn't that weird? I wanna be in another country, but I want to just stay here in my room as well. Oh my twisted twisted mind.
And so the time has come for the cars to start clambering around the street below. The peace has gone. Hay. That's why I don't like not being able to sleep during this time of day. My brain won't shut up. Thoughts, mostly really sad thoughts, come dancing around my mind.
I can't wait when all this is over.
